Turkey Farmer, or Fancy Farmer

Ladies and Gentlemen, I bring you your first turkey-themed drink of the season. On this blog. For today anyway. With two variations, the Turkey Farmer is not a beverage for the faint of heart.

If you like your kisses sweet and your drinks tart, this one'll win your heart.

Also, if you are pregnant or of impaired immune response don't try this at home. It features fresh cranberry puree, and most importantly an egg white for body and balance. The recipe is as follows:

When I say "parts" I say that because I have NO idea how many ounces my measuring jigger actually holds. Plus, I feel proportion is more important here than ounce by ounce accuracy.

The secret to mixing a cocktail with an egg white is to first "dry shake", meaning shake all ingredients in your shakey shaker without ice to ensure even mixing and promote frothing. Then and only then, add your ice and re-shake.

Instructions:

• Fill martini glasses with ice and cold water
• In shaker with no ice add all ingredients, shake foreverrrr until egg has frothed
• Add ice and re-shake until you can hear the ice breaking into chunks & chips
• Empty glasses and pour in drink, garnish with lemon peel

Ingredient Notes:

• To make cranberry puree, pour bag of fresh cranberries into small saucepan and bring to a boil, then reduce to medium-low heat. Blend with immersion blender in saucepan and store up to a week in the fridge.
• Sweetness: I use Xylitol (thanks, sis!), but feel free to make simple syrup with brown, white, or raw sugar. For Fancy Farmer  make syrup tossing in herbs such as lavendar, rosemary, or sage
• Also, don't use a Turkey egg white, because, gross?

Perfect Shepherd's Pie

Did you grow up eating Shepherd's Pie? Since this was never in my culinary repertoire its name always confused me as a kiddo. Is it a pie made of shepherds? Is it a pie made for shepherds or by shepherds?

For the uninitiated, Shepherd's Pie is a sort of meat and potato casserole, with a layer of meat and veggies in their gravy on bottom and mashed potatoes on top, broiled to toasty perfection.

This recipe from America's Test Kitchen is nearly perfect, but I found it to be...seasoned in the French style? As in, not really seasoned at all (sorry Frenchies)! So here's my version of a spiced up Shepherd's Pie.

There are a lot of moving pieces here, so I strongly recommend you get your mise-en-place on for this one, especially if you're dumb like me and want both parts going at the same time.

INGREDIENTS:

• 1 ½ pounds 93 percent lean ground beef  
•  2 tbs plus 2 tsp water
• Salt and pepper
• ·       ½ teaspoon baking soda
  ·       2 ½ pounds russet potatoes , peeled and cut into 1-inch chunks
  ·       4 tbs unsalted butter , melted
  ·       ½ cup milk
  ·       1 large egg yolk
  ·       8 scallions , green parts only, sliced thin
  ·       2 tsp vegetable oil
  ·       1onion , chopped
  ·       4 ounces white mushrooms , trimmed and chopped
  ·       1 tbs tomato paste
  ·       2 garlic cloves , minced
  ·       2 tbs Madeira or ruby port
  ·       2 tbs all-purpose flour
  ·       1 ¼ cups beef broth
  ·       2 tsp Worcestershire sauce
  ·       2 sprigs fresh thyme
  ·       1 bay leaf
  ·       2 carrots , peeled and chopped
  ·       2 tsp cornstarch
• 2 tbs of your favorite spice mix, such as shawarma mix, taco seasoning, Italian pasta seasoning, etc. Yes, tablespoons.
• 
  
• DIRECTIONS

1. Without kneading it, add 2 tbs of water, 1 tsp salt, 1/4 tsp pepper, and 1/2 tsp baking soda to ground beef in a bowl. Return to fridge for 20 minutes.
2. Place potatoes in medium saucepan, with just enough water to cover. Add salt and bring to a boil on high heat, then reduce to medium-low simmering 8-10 minutes until knife tip meets no resistance in potato.
3. Drain potatoes and return to saucepan over heat to evaporate any remaining water.
4. Remove from pan and mash, adding melted butter.
5. In small bowl whisk together milk and egg yolk, then stir into potatoes.
6. Stir scallions into mashed potatoes and add salt + pepper to taste. Set aside.
7. In broiler-safe skillet (I used cast iron, but anything without a rubber handle should do), heat oil until shimmering.
8. Add onion, mushrooms, 1/2 tsp salt, and 1/4 tsp pepper cooking 4-6 minutes until vegetables are just starting to soften and dark bits form on skillet (see picture above).
9. Add tomato paste and cook 2 minutes more, then wine while scraping browned bits off of the pan, then add flour cooking 1 minute more 
10. Add broth, Worcestershire, thyme, bay leaf, carrots, and spice mix then bring to a boil while scraping some browned bits.
11. Reduce heat to medium-low, add beef in 2-inch chunks to broth, and bring to gentle simmer. 
12. Cover and cook until beef is cooked through, 10 to 12 minutes, stirring and breaking up meat chunks with 2 forks halfway through.
13. Stir cornstarch and remaining 2 tsp water together in bowl. Stir cornstarch mixture into filling and continue to simmer for 30 seconds. 
14. Remove thyme and bay leaf, add salt and pepper to taste.
15. Adjust oven rack to 5 inches below broiler and start broiler on high.
16. Spoon potatoes into zip lock bag with corner cut off and pipe over pan covering entire surface and all edges. Smooth surface with spoon and rake with fork to create texture.
17. Place skillet in oven for 10 minutes or until golden brown on top. You'll know it when you see it

Shout out to  my awesome sister Venus for hosting this cooking adventure and for hand modeling in the video above!

Adapted from America's Test Kitchen, my ever-loving food guide.

Stellar Mani

I've been wanting to do a Philae-related post and decided to save it for a girlie nail post because science babes, that's why.

For those of you who tl;dr -ed the articles about Philae's mission, here are my two favorite points (besides embarrassing you for your shitty parking jobs):

• Tell us about the elemental composition at the time of the formation of our solar system
• Give us clues about the role of comets in bringing water to Earth

To show your popular science cred on your nails, you'll need:

• Any base coat--I use a basic Sally Hansen Double Duty Base & Top Coat
• A deep, dark matte seen here with Essie's nail color Wicked
• Sephora's Formula X Volatile
• Julep's Freedom Polymer Top Coat--gives you the gel effect without being a pain to remove

Paint a thin layer of the base coat on your badself, then one thick or two thin layers of Wicked depending on the saturation you want.

Want a little red peeking through? That "purposefully" messy paint job will be just fine.

Frost your tips, 90's style with Formula X Volatile and follow with Julep's Freedom Polymer Top Coat.

 Voila--you look stellar with your Philae mani! Here's what you'll sound like, whirring through space:

https://soundcloud.com/esaops/a-singing-comet

Melon-tinis

Much like Scrubs' J.D. I prefer a good fruit-tini to beer most of the time.

I. Hate. Artificial. Fruit. Flavor.

So I learned to make my own home made fruit-tinis. The one seen above is made with cantelope, using vodka and the one seen below is mango with special delicious Don Julio 70.

Ingredients:

• Fruit of choice (fresh or frozen works here, but what ever is in season is always most delicious)
• Sweetner of choice (sugar, brown sugar, Xylitol, honey, Splenda, etc)
• Lemon juice -- try to use fresh for the love of God
• Fresh mint 
• Vodka, Tequila, or Rum of choice (personally I don't like Rum so let's not choose that--too sweet, blargh!)

Equipment:

• Cutting board & knife if using fresh fruit
• Medium saucepan
• Immersion blender (for easy clean-up) or regular blender
• Martini shaker
• Chilled martini glasses
• Shot glass or jigger for measuring

Now, let's get fancy.

1. Chop fruit and place in sauce pan with sweetner of choice on medium heat (If using frozen fruit, this give it time to come back to life)
2. Add lemon juice, and a bit--maybe 1/4 of a cup--of water and use immersion blender to reduce chunks into a fruity soup (if using blender dump into vessel once they look like they're all warmed up then blend and return to pan)
3. Let it thicken in pan on medium-low heat until syrupy consistency is achieved
4. While it cools, fill your martini glasses with ice and cold water and set aside to chill
5. Fill martini shaker half-way with ice and add two shots of cooled puree and and two shots of alcohol per person (max of two in shot glass).
6. Shake your heart out.
7. Empty your now-chilled martini glasses and rub a fresh mint leaf all the way around the rim, repeat with lemon wedge.
8. Pour your delicious fancy drinks and enjoy! 

First things first...

So you want to start a new blog? You're probably waiting for that spark. That moment of inspiration.

That idea that makes you feel like an adult with a reason for rambling on the internet but like so many lame-o's before you, it never comes.

Yet, we blog anyway...

Baby it's cold outside!

So what does cold make us want to do? Stay inside and get cozy and crafty. So I present to you, while not a new project, one of my favorites. A super cozy little blanket I knitted for my now three-year-old niece on the occasion of her birth.

I chose a sweet melony pink for this blanket, and picked out what ever felt soft and cozy.

A free pattern for a Basketweave Baby Blanket is available free on Ravelry, but as it is so simple I will just repost here in the interest of time.

The truth is, the pattern here is not the exact one since the pattern I used is not reversible--showing a wavy form on the back--but after three years, this is the closest I've found.

WANTED: The real pattern for this blanket!

• Cast on 180 
• Rows 1-6: knit 6, purl 6 (known as seed stitch) and repeat to last six stitches, then 6 seed stitches (i.e. k, p, k, p, k, p)
• Rows 7-12: 6 seed stitch (purl 6, knit 6) and repeat to last six stitches, then 6 seed stitches 
• Repeat 22 times
• Six rows of seed stitch (k, p, k, p, k, p, etc.)
• Bind off

Have you seen the pattern for this baby blanket anywhere?